2 weeks...

A lot has happened in the past two weeks. I went for a good ride today with JV. We went on the Soos Creek Trail. I forgot how bad hills suck. Most of the rides I have gone on in the past few years have been fairly flat.

I've gone to tow more Sake Bomb Sundays since my last post. The last one has been the best so far. I don't know why. I think it's partially because I'm kind of smittne with this gal there. I don't know her that well and yet, I feel like I'm starting to like her quite a bit. We've only been texting and writing, but it's been cool.

Random note, the Mariner'sjust won in extra innings on a walk-off homerun while I wrote that last thing. That's so awesome. It was wierd because Langerhanns fouled a ball off the heal of the bat and the next pitch he hit a 2 run homerun... It was awesome... Is that what happens when I think of the girl? Good stuff?? hahah That's funny right there.

Things have gotten a bit better at work, but not the best still. My Sup. is coming back tomorrow after basically a week off. I'm kind of nervous about things. We'll see what happens I suppose.

My dad and his gf got their marriage liscense this past weekend. I'm happy for them, yet nervous at the same time. She's going to be moving in with us fairly soon. We'll see what happens....

Okay, thanks for listening. Til the next time.

Monday

Today was a lazy day. I went out to Sakebomb Sunday last night and had a good time. I then slept until 10am today. I got up and played on facebook and did a few other things. Eventually, went out to dinner with my dad. Then came home and talked to friends on the net.

I have a lot of things to figure out here in the next few days. Tomorrow is my 'Sunday'. I'm gonna get on the whole working out thing again. Stuff to do. Stuff to do...

Today

Today was a great day in one sence. The Troopers played in there first Finals in 23 years. They ended in 12th place. The best since my rookie year of 95'. Amazing. I'm so happy. I'd be lying if I said I didn't start tearing up reading all of the posts on troopersdrumcorps.com. I'm truly happy for everyone who has gone through the toughest of situations that the corps has endured.

It was a sad day in the fact that it would have been one of my good friends 31st birthdays. He lost his life to suicide almost two years ago. It was good to see his family and friends come together and enjoy each others company. I hope that he is watching and helping me in my adventures...

Work was really slow today. I only got 51 minutes of training. I did get to spend a lot of quality time studying and observing. I wish it was busier though... Oh well. That means I have more time there.

Okay, I just picked dad up from the airport about 2 hours ago and I have to work at 630am tomorrow. Especially after the very short amount of sleep from last night. Tonight I'll get just about 6 hours, if I go now.. Ok, Now.... No, seriously, I'm off now. Good night.

Two days

My weekend is normally Mondays and Tuesdays. Therefore, I have worked two days this week as it is Thursday. Holy cow have they been horrible. I can't seem to do anything right. I now have both of my trainers dissappointed in me and I'm now getting moderate turbulance. Ugh, why won't this get any easier for me...? I know the right answers if I'm asked about 90% of the time. I'm just second guessing myself way too much.

Everyone keeps saying that it'll get easier and I know that it will. However, I just don't seeing it happening very soon. It could. I just don't know.

It just seems like such a slow process for me. I want to succeed. How do I succeed when there isn't much I can do at home? Or is there?

Okay... venting done.

Epiphany

I just realized that I have never given 100% to anything in my life. I have been up to about 83%. I need to get on this. I need to start busting ass and getting stuff done.

Inner Yoda

I was talking with my uncle Lance last night. I was telling him about my struggles at work and that I was trying to get everything. He busted out like Yoda and said, "trying, means that you are setting yourself up for failure.' When you try, you are not neccesarily going to DO anything. You leave that opportunity to fail in there.

Therefore, I'm not going to try to complete my training. I'm going to do it. I'm going to step it up. I'm not going to let my trainer dislike for me pull me down. I'm not going to let things get in my way.

In doing so, I need to change some things. I can't always be available to go out like I always have been. I can't always be checking email and facebook. I can't be distracting myself with mondane things. What I need to do is start going to work, to the library or somewhere quiet to study, go to the gym and then go home....

Here it comes. Better not get in my way. I'm gonna do it.

Starting anew

Okay, I haven't written in a public blog in a while. When I have written, it has been hidden. I'm going to start talking and sharing stuff that is going on in my life on here.

I'm going through some changes in the way I'm trying to think and feel. I'm really focusing on being more positive and creating positive in my life. Come along with me on the journey. I just need to hold myself accountable to actually write on here. It's a struggle, but again, I'll get there.